A greater gloom
Sundays have been vey bad days for me. It's back to my Sec Ops days when I was always depressed, in pre-Monday blues. Thought I would be happier since my transfer, maybe I am, but most times, I still feel very helpless and upset.My boss just keeps piling more stuff on my team, when we are already loaded with work that keeps us in the office past 7-8pm every day. My team leader is worse, think she doesn't get off every day before 9pm. Already I have told him many times, we are too busy every time he tells us to do something, he just flip us off.
He is someone who doesn't commit. When we feedback to him about things we shouldn't be doing, he will say he agree and whether he does anything or not, it's another thing. Whenever this is a training, he will say he strongly encourages us, so much so we can predict what he is going to say everytime. His vocab is quite limited.
Did I mention he is also very stingy? Our Xmas present last year is a small combination lock with the company logo. My long timer colleague said it is a free gift from a golf tournament 2 yrs ago. How cheap it that! He never takes us out to dinner. For CNY, my team members had to treat ourselves. Quite sad, we do not feel any appreciate from him. His Thank-Yous are just words, easily dispense.
My pregnant colleague had to work like a dog on her last day of work before going on leave in the same afternoon. That was even after she told him she was not well and had to see the gynae. His response to her was that she had to finish her job before going off. How sympathetic...
He just keep giving us projects to do. Something which makes me feel very helpless and angry. Cos these projects are way out of my expertise and sometimes I just don't know what to do. One of the company's tradition is always to take in new products selling although we do not have the systems nor the resources to handle it. Most times, the management just push it through and the process ends up very manual and burdensome to us lowly office drones.
I wonder why the people in my company works so hard. End of the day, the partners reap the benefits while the rest of us are still paid less then the market rate.
Look at one of my current project, which is about automating an existing process. It was developed 2 yrs ago and has been passed through many hands. We have a project team which has ranked personnel to develop this. This rankedpersonnel gets paid at least 7k a month, and the work she did is just pure crap cos she does not have any knowledge of the process at all.
An external vendor is hired to develop the automation, an engine that's simply soo simplic to handle the logic. Again, it's churned out more manual workfor the rest of us. My team and I wonder why they do not solicit feedback or assistance from the current users or this other very experienced team member of mine who has been managing the process and knows all about the logic.
Strange but it happens in my firm. Now, I have to clean up the poop and make sure the incoming poop does not smell badly. The management has promised to marketing to roll the requirements out by 1st quarter, my boss is always asking me to update him (like how I could when I'm handling other dateline stuff), and now the management says if it cannot be fully automated, we will just hire more people. What mentality.
They finally utilised one of the 2 headcounts I didn't even know we have. My boss is now feeling the heat at this late hour. Gush, if he has been so concerned before, this state would not have happended. As it is, he's been going home early before the rest of us to know how hard we are working. Always thinking we are very capable and not having enough work to do.
My pent-up frustration is so great. M and work, work and M. Just now he grabbed my arm in fun and I wish it will breakor sprain. Then at least, I can have an excuse not to step into office tomorrow.
Also depressed again on not spending enough time with him. I could be at home with him now, instead of he having to send me back and me having to worry about him driving home alone when he falls asleep too easliy. It would have been greatly comforting to be with him. Maybe my job will be more tolerable.
Hate to whine so much, but I can't help it. Blogging it out lightens me up a little. Going to take my depression with me to sleep soon. Having this recurring dream about forgetting to do 20 pages of Chinese homework. Must be lingering job phobia...
posted by Meak Meak @ 10:00 PM
1 Comments:
Cheers to my introducing of blogging orelse u have to nagnag & blueblue le.
Come on cheer up lady, just call mi if u need a chat, a kopi, a swim, a shopping partner down orcahrd road, someone to share the fats while eating hagendax icecream
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