The Meak Muses

Contemplations

Mum told me she has the same dream abt me and moo breaking up. only mentioned it when i told her abt the dream i had last night, think she wouldnt have told me if i havent told her mine..
anyway, just wonder.. after finished talking to moo last night, he was just going to hang up and i said he doesnt say he luvs me anymore. he just went "yah." so i went "yah." too and hung up. when we just started out, he would have said it or text me after we hung up. now he doesnt...

If i have really been searching for a reason to break up, that would have been it.. but i know he still does.. at least, i think so.. truth is, maybe feelings have died for us.. or stablised.. maybe it is the time that we do not have to constantly say we luv each other, but we should know and take it for granted?!?! but as i've always been a literal person, what he doesnt say will leave me guessing and wondering.. have we fallen out of luv? when he does say it, is it a habit or obligation?

maybe he does luv me, but he cannot afford it.. with his new job, unsettled career, and generally being a young upstart which for a 29yr old, is someone who should be concentrating fully on his career, and is the best time to do it.. does he feel that i'm a liability holding him back, taking up time he could use elsewhere? does he find caring for me a burden?

my mum says not to waste my time if there is no progress, but question: what do i want?

posted by Meak Meak @ 1:47 PM